How To Live Life Of True Alignment
Just a few years ago, I was living a life unaligned with who I truly was. I was surrounded by unaligned groups of people, immersed myself in environments and situations that I didn’t truly enjoy (at all), and continually shied away from what I knew was meant for me. In other words, I settled for where I was even though I wasn’t content with it. Why? Because I *naively* chose the comfort of what I believed was security over the leap of faith that I didn’t know would eventually provide me with genuine joy and excitement for life. I was living out of alignment with my truest self and otherwise settling for unaligned circumstances that kept me in a constant loop of frustration, tension, anxiety, and general dissatisfaction.
It wasn’t until I woke up to how utterly unhappy I was with my life and decided to take control of where I was, as I knew no area of my life at the time (my relationship, frequent alcohol consumption, party-centric lifestyle) was aligned with what I truly wanted. From there, I decided to get back into alignment and onto the path I knew would put my passions at the forefront and bring my dreams to fruition.
Today’s topic, shifting from an unaligned life to true alignment, is to show you that no matter where you are, you can always change the trajectory of your life. Even if you feel stuck (misalignment), there is always the option to shift into flow (alignment). Where you are right now is not where you need to be tomorrow and it’s most definitely not where you need to be five months from now.
See, the amazing and funny thing about life is that we have the power to control and create our circumstances. I know it doesn’t seem like that, but hear me out: every single decision that we make either moves us in the direction of alignment or misalignment. These choices either bring us closer to the life we desire or further away from it. I read an amazing book called “Atomic Habits”, and in it, James Clear talks about how our life is hidden in our daily routines. Our daily choices make up our lives. So each time you make a choice, ask yourself: “is this choice moving me closer to or farther away from the life I dream about?”
When we wake up in the morning, from the first breath we take to the first step we take, we are in control of our habits, routines, and choices, thus making us the creators of our own reality. So as with everything, be intentional about your choices and remember that you are in control.
Now let’s decipher what it means to be in state of alignment or misalignment.
When we are out of alignment, we often begin to experience stagnation. We’re working a job we hate, in an industry we’re not passionate about, and feel as though each day in the office sucks the life out of us. Or maybe we’re in a romantic relationship that we feel entirely disconnected from. We feel frustrated, tense, rigid, and angry at life! When we are misaligned, life feels difficult when it shouldn’t. That’s because we aren’t in flow. And what happens when we aren’t in a state of flow? We get stuck. The same way that when the body is not in flow we experience trouble digesting, bloat, lack of regularity, and generalized inflammation, we also get blocked, stuck, and stagnant when we are blocking ourselves from what is meant for us.
Contrary to misalignment, when we are aligned, we enter a state of flow. This flow allows us to effortlessly connect with like-minded individuals, inspires us to take creative action, or confidently leave the job we feel miserable in and pursue one that brings us joy and supports us on our path. This flow state supports us in creating the life that we desire. We feel more excited, motivated, driven, and in awe of life.
To be in alignment is to live your life with intention, to continually choose yourself and your own desires over those of other people, and to pursue your greatest passions and your purpose. When we do this, we experience joy fueled momentum that puts us in this flow state. Stepping into alignment is like finding the sweet spot to life, everything seamlessly begins to click.
When we choose alignment over misalignment, we are choosing the things that light a fire within us over the things that make us feel dull. Because when we are living out of alignment, we feel drained, our energy is low, and we don’t feel excitement or zest for life. Rather than feeling lit up, we say yes to things we truly want to say no to, we live other people’s dreams instead of our own, and we stay in environments that we (consciously or subconsciously) know keep us stagnant for the sake of security, comfort, stability, or simply because we don’t know any better.
Now it might seem like a no-brainer that anyone would want to choose alignment over misalignment. However, it’s not always that easy, hence the reason I’m writing this. Below are a few reasons as to why we often shy away from stepping into a more aligned life:
Reason 1: We’re afraid of change. We fear what might happen if we take a leap of faith or take that risk we know has the potential to change our lives. We allow fear to get the best of us, and instead of leaning into the fear, we stay in unaligned situations because it feels “safe”.
Reason 2: We’re afraid others won’t accept us. So often, we are living out of alignment to please others. Exhibit A, me! For years, I was living in an unaligned way solely to please the people around me. My friends were drinking? I was drinking. My social groups were going out? I was going out. Everyone else was ordering the burger and fries? I was also ordering the burger and fries (To be clear, I’ve never liked red meat my entire life. Wtf!). But that’s what happens when we chase the approval of others over alignment with our true self. We eat and drink things we don’t like, we go places we don’t want to do, and we pursue activities we don’t actually want to do for the sake of fitting into the crowd. Well, let me let you in on a little secret: the more you try to be liked by living out of alignment, the more the Universe is going to knock you down (over and over again) until you wake up and get aligned with yourself.
To my point: if you don’t like burgers, don’t order the freaking burger.
Reason 3: We don’t know how. A few years ago, before I made the conscious choice to take full control of my life and circumstances, I was stuck in this “waiting around” mindset. In other words, I would wait around for things to come to me rather than proactively chasing the things I desired. I was married to this belief that I would wake up one day and my dream life would suddenly drop into my life. And while that might seem crazy, you would be shocked at how many people live their life with this same mindset. More often than not, we go through our lives waiting for our “big break”. Our dream partner, a lump sum of money, our dream career that skyrockets us into success, wealth, and effortless abundance. We wait and wait (many people wait their entire lives) for something to happen, for momentum, for this feeling of contentment and bliss to appear out of thin air. When I had my “spiritual awakening” (sounds cringe, I know, but stay with me) I realized that this waiting around mentality was not working and it never was going to work. I also realized that part of me was waiting for my desired life to come to me because I didn’t know how to obtain it.
See, there’s no rulebook on how to break free from unaligned circumstances to find alignment. If there was a rulebook, or rather a simple set of guidelines, we’d all be happy, deeply in love, and super abundant living in our purpose, right? So reason three is that we often don’t know how to set ourselves free. We don’t know how to break out of the cycle of stagnation.
Now you’re probably wondering, “well if I AM living an unaligned life, stuck in an unaligned relationship, working an unaligned job, consuming unaligned things, living in an unaligned environment… how do I move from this blocked state to an aligned state?”
To move from a state of being stuck to one that effortlessly flows, you first need to get clear on what is holding you back, what you truly want and desire, and what steps you can begin to take to kickstart the shift.
If you are someone who is experiencing frustration and tension in various areas of your life, whether that be a romantic relationship that you can’t seem to step away from, a job that brings you financial security but daily dread, depression, and frustration, or a lifestyle of partying that brings you the “stability” of friendships but drains your soul of energy and joy, ask yourself, “what is keeping me here?” And really ask yourself. More times than not, it’s fear that keeps us there.
We are all prisoners to fear in some area of our life, at some point. Fear holds us back, it keeps us from taking risks and leaning into change, it keeps us in fear-based loops that prevent us from from so many opportunities. But if fear is what continues to hold you back, remind yourself that in order to leap-of-faith to secure your dreams, you must leave fear behind. When you release the fear and finally let go of all the things that hold you back from flow, trust that the Universe will support you as you shift into true alignment.
Then, lean into your passions, pursue your purpose, create things that fill you up, spend time with people who inspire and motivate you. When we live in alignment with our soul’s purpose, doors open for us. The Universe helps us to co-create the life that we’ve been dreaming of.
Living in alignment doesn’t mean that every area of life suddenly feels perfect overnight. Nothing ever will be perfect! However, once we begin to take baby steps towards finding alignment in our relationships, circumstances, and external environments, we begin to feel a weight lifted off our shoulders. Stepping into alignment turns rigidity into peace and tension into contentment.
The life you desire is just around the corner. What are you waiting for?
